a little space to breathe // open

[Hanna Marin]

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Holding onto her cup tightly, she bit her lip. the coffee had gone stone cold by now, not that it mattered. too much had happened, and reality just wasn't sinking in. hanna couldn't stand to be in her room...she wanted the whole thing gone, destroyed. it was all ruined. she stared ahead blankly, everyone was just getting on with their every day things. dads going to work in a hurry, mums taking the kids to school, everything around her was a buzz of activity, yet inside she felt numb. how does someone get past all this? when does the mark that was left fade into nothing?

what was worse was that the more she tried to forget, the less she could look her friends in the eye. everything they'd been through, they'd been through together. and yet hanna felt more alone than ever. caleb had done everything he could since they were found, her mum had become her shadow...she was never alone, but she felt it more than ever. the three people who would understand were the three she couldn't be around. biting down on her lip she shook her head. no matter what she knew she had to get on with a normal life, no more of this...A was gone, the police had caught him and there was nothing left for them to fear...so why didn't she feel safe? since the police arrested andrew, hanna had felt like something was wrong, call it a gut feeling or whatever...it was there.

her phone bleeped loudly, a strange noise and one that usually filled her with fear. pulling it out of her bag, hanna glanced at the message on the screen. "where are you? what time did you leave this morning? you should have woken me up. mom x" a pang of guilt ran over her, she really didn't want her mom to panic, not after the past few weeks. but hanna needed to get out, be alone and just feel normal again. nothing about this was normal, that she could admit, but what was the harm in trying? "sorry, i just needed some air, couldn't sleep...i'm at the brew. h,x" pressing send, she knew her mom wouldn't be relaxed until she was home. just ten more minutes, and a fresh coffee, she thought to herself grabbing her bag from beside her.

she ordered another decafe latte - trouble sleeping meant caffeine was off the cards for the time being - and waited patiently at the counter for it to be poured. as she waited, hanna read the labels of all the different kinds of coffee beans that sat in jars on the shelf behind the till, trying to work out why there were so many and what exactly the difference in taste was. all she knew was strong, milky or decaf and realistically...they all pretty much tasted the same to her.

[Spencer Hastings]

Caffeine.

Spencer wasn't sleeping either, but she wouldn't give up caffeine, no way. Not at a time like this. She felt distant from her friends, even though they still spent a lot of time together. She had been trapped with them, but separated from them at the same time. She was separating herself now, she knew that. She needed to get back into the swing of things...

But what was the swing of things? For the past forever her normal life was living in fear of A every second. But now that was over, what was normal now? She was grateful, of course, but she of all people knew that A was never working alone. Charles was never working alone.

She stopped to take a breath on her way to the brewery. Don't think about him. Don't think that name, she mentally chided herself until she got her wits about her and approached the counter. She ordered a coffee, then looked over to see none other than Hanna standing a few feet away.

She felt a rush of relief, but also a small rush of embarrassment. She didn't know why. She moved over toward her blonde friend, very careful not to startle her. "Hey Han," she said, smiling a little strained at her.

Hanna Marin

[Hanna Marin]

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Hanna was completely out of it, staring up at the jars of coffee. so much so she didn't even notice someone come into the brew. it was only when spencer spoke up that hanna snapped her head round to look at her friend. the strained smile on her face said it all. spencer didn't know how to act either, and she was pretty strong when it came to this whole thing. if she was struggling, what hope did any of them have? hanna gave a small nod and a smile back, trying to make it look a little more relaxed. "oh hey spence, sorry i didn't hear you come in...i was just, um.." trying not to think about the ordeal they'd all managed to escape from -- well thats what she wanted to say. it probably wasn't the best time for that.

"you're here early," she stated plainly -- a fact, not a question. spencer was a known caffeine addict, like hanna, but with the prescription tablets she'd been given to help her sleep, hanna had thought it best to not drink caffeine...at least for a little while. "do you want a coffee...or a decaf...or something?" she asked awkwardly, since when was being in the company of any one of her friends awkward? this whole situation had left them in a complete mess, could they even really trust each other anymore?

she pulled out her purse and looked expectantly at her friend, this one would be on her - a gesture to show that in hanna's eyes, despite everything, they were still friends. or at least she hoped they were. she bit down on her lip, slightly nibbling it. "i don't suppose you've spoken to the others?" the answer to that was bound to be no but she had to ask. hanna needed her friends, almost as much as she needed space and time alone - but that was going to have to end sooner or later. they needed answers, they needed to know that they were safe, that nothing was going to happen to any of them again.

Spencer Hastings

[Spencer Hastings]

Spencer simply waved off Hannas apology of not noticing her, she completely understood zoning out the world around you. As Hanna offered her a coffee Spencer shook her head, "I've ordered one," she said, catching Hannas gesture with the purse. It was sweet of her, and Spencer got the hidden message behind it, "I'll let you get the next one?" she offered. This would show that Spencer wanted to see her again, maybe they could even get the others to come. Maybe they could try something to normalize things...

 "Even with the 'help' I haven't been able to sleep much, it's better to just wake up in the morning and keep myself busy..." she trailed off a little at the end. How were her and her friends supposed to talk? What about? A had been their whole life for years, now they were supposed to just act like normal people? Spencer wanted that to happen, more than anything, but she didn't know how.

She shook her head at Hannahs question about the other ladies. "No... I should though. We should," she said, turning to pick up her coffee as the two were finished and placed in front of them. Spencer gestured to a table nearby and moved to it, "I think we've all taken a lot of time to ourselves... which isn't a bad thing." It just needed to end sooner rather than later.

Hanna Marin